lunaticheathen Posted June 22, 2012 Share Posted June 22, 2012 Awwww....I was happy with stories of ministers getting roasted like pigs. (I know, I ain't right.) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrsRoper Posted June 23, 2012 Share Posted June 23, 2012 Something I would like to bring up about this woman is that she has boundary issues. She is blaming other people for "making" her feel a certain way (hurt). So her solution is to endeavor to cause other people to act differently so that her feelings are not hurt. This is unrealistic and an inappropriate response to emotions. Expecting other people to act in ways that always make you feel good is just plain ignorant. The only person you can change is yourself. My mother was this way. In her mind I was responsible for making her feel certain ways and I was expected to act only in ways that she approved of. It is not right! I think it is a good thing you are standing up for your rights in this instance. I feel you are in the right in claiming you have the right to say whatever you want on your own wall. If she doesn't like it, it is up to her to do something about it, and crying about it isn't the answer. She isn't merely "sharing her feelings", she is expecting people to change their behavior to suit her standards and that is not right. I'll bet she is a bitch of a teacher! Whoo whoo!! See this is exactly what I meant when I flippantly diagnosed her with a personality disorder. sjessen you are a thoughtful woman, unlike me who just makes jokes. LOL, I hope you are just joking about yourself because I have found your posts very interesting! I have had to deal with this issue of boundaries because of my upbringing. My mother had unreasonable boundaries, so I didn't have reasonable boundaries. I read some books and did a lot of changing, so that is how I am familiar with this subject. In case anyone is interested, (I hesitate to recommend these books seeing as how we are all ex-Christians here) if you can tolerate the Christian-eze in these books, they have some really good information on setting reasonable boundaries. The first book is Boundaries: When to Say Yes and When to Say No to Take Control of Your Life, by McCloud and Townsend. The other good book along the lines of personal development and self-improvement by these same authors is Changes That Heal. These two books together helped me make some major changes in my life that were healing and so beneficial for everyday living. Just FYI. We have a lot in common, I had a similar upbringing. I am joking about myself, but I also do diagnose everyone with a personality disorder. LOL. I am the lady that needs to step away from the DSM. I will check those books out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted June 23, 2012 Share Posted June 23, 2012 Aaaaaand here we go: No, I'm just asking them to think about it before posting hurtful things in a public space. They can still post them, but rather sit there, feeling upset but not saying anything, I was open about something that was hurting my feelings. That way, my friends who don't want to hurt me actually have a chance of knowing that something they are doing is making me sad/angry. If I kept my mouth shut, that would be "pissy", because that would be expecting them to be psychic about it. Completely clueless. Typical churchie "world revolves around me and my feelings" attitude. My response: I'm fairly certain when somebody posts something on his own wall it is not done with you in mind. Profiles are for expressing personality and opinions. Just as you have the right to share your beliefs on here, if someone is of the opinion that a particular religion is worthy of ridicule, then it is his right to share that. I recently un-friended an acquaintance for similar reasons: I posted a brief rant on how I was visited by Jehova witness' 3 times in 3 months at my new apartment complex. A friend made a derogatory comment about said JW. Then this co worker comes to my wall and chimes in with the mockery with: "and the really funny thing is they believe only 140 people are going to get into heaven. How stupid is that? Why bother? lol" To which I replied, "Actually, the number is 144,000 people, but the really stupid thing is the idea of heaven in the first place. Just cause I exist at this moment in time I am going to exist forever? How arrogant is that?" Well, she did NOT like that comment, and came back very defensive. I simply pointed out that she had no problems mocking a faith that wasn't hers but did not like when the mockery came close to home. She, of course, disagreed, but we left it at that. About 2 weeks later, I see she has posted: Atheism: The Belief that nothing suddenly exploded and made everything" or some equally poor straw man. I was the second to answer this, someone else had calmly stated that her post was inaccurate and then linked to the definition of Atheism. I, otoh, wrote: Even if that was not a gross over-simplification, it still makes infinite more sense than an all powerful god having sex with a virgin so he can become a human and sacrifice himself to himself as the only way to save the humans he made faulty in the first place. I come back a bit later, and my comment as well as the other guys was removed, and there were lots of likes and "right on" comments on display. I called her on it. Publicly. She deleted my comments and then tried to smooth things over in a private IM. I told her in no uncertain terms how I viewed her actions as censorship in the classic christian tradition. She thought she had every right to put on her wall what she wanted to. Which she does, but she still was not seeing my point that she can mock whoever she wants to, but gets offended if anyone even comes close to mocking her. So in the middle of her typing something to me, I simply deleted her as a friend. The really funny thing is, she had the hots for me big time. She stalked me on FB, asked me out constantly, and I hid from her and turned her down at every turn. Seems like that little problem has taken care of itself...lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RedStar Posted June 23, 2012 Share Posted June 23, 2012 she still was not seeing my point that she can mock whoever she wants to, but gets offended if anyone even comes close to mocking her. This really annoys me,and so many Christians do it. I don't think I've ever met a Christian who was happy to shit all over other people's beliefs but be fine with others doing it to them. It's only ok if it isn't them that gets upset lol. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mcdaddy Posted June 23, 2012 Share Posted June 23, 2012 They have no idea how fucking batshit crazy their own beliefs are. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Akheia Posted June 23, 2012 Share Posted June 23, 2012 I've had to leave forums before over that. Made me quite cross, too. One I really liked. They at least *said* and *pretended* to be welcoming to all, but who really meant they just wanted people who were right-wing evangelicals like themselves. They happily tromped all over other faiths and ideas, but got quite defensive when someone dared issue a word of truth about the gobbled-down preacher-issued lies they constantly shat out. I got tired of debunking Halloween myths about pagans/Satanists (they were rock-solid sure that the terms were completely interchangeable) roaming the countryside looking for black kitties to slaughter for their dark god and the variety of other disgusting myths and lies they believed wholesale. I finally just advised them to amend their greeting message to say "Right-wing fundies only please," and walked away. As much as I happily shoulder the burden of being the Cosmic Avenger sometimes, I just wasn't prepared to do it on a sewing forum. Such little bubbles exist all over the internet, and they probably all think they're "welcoming to all faiths and creeds" just like that one. I wish I could say this had happened recently; it was 20 years ago and fundagelicals haven't improved noticeably since. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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