R. S. Martin Posted December 19, 2008 Share Posted December 19, 2008 Hi Churee, You've been asking where is the best place on these forums. I would also say wherever you feel comfortable. Take a look around. Read anything that you find interesting or helpful. If you see anything you want to respond to, feel free to do so. Some people read for a month or two before responding a lot. You sound like a sensitive and friendly person. We have a Rants and Replies section for when we have "issues" we want to rant about. Sometimes I am not sure where I should post a topic so I look what kind of things other have posted there. We also have a section for ExChristian Life. When family or former friends treat us nasty because of our deconversion, that is a place we tend to go for support. Quite a few sections have rules or guidelines to help us know what kinds of things should be posted in them, and who may or may not post in them. There are a number of places where Christians are not allowed to post so that it is safe for us to speak openly about our problems. All the same, some of us are careful about posting photos or identifying details (real names, names of place where we live, etc.) on a public forum like this because anyone in the world can see it, including people who might like to get back at us. Some of us have no one like that in our lives and post anything we like, while others of us fear that former church members or family members will find our posts and make our lives even more miserable. Just thought I'd mention this, since you said you're totally new to talking on forums. The name I use looks like a real name but it's a pen name. ~Ruby PS I saw your question about Christmas. Many people on here have different feelings about it. I am comfortable with wishing people a nice Christmas. For me, it is just as much a secular holiday as anything else. That is probably because of my background. My story is in my profile. However, the Humanists of this area (when they know they are talking to other Humanists) talk about the Winter Solstice. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Trike Posted December 19, 2008 Share Posted December 19, 2008 Hi there and welcome! I'm new here too, so I'm trying to get ahold of the ropes as well. And I can sympathize with the feeling of being lost and scared. For me, one of the hardest parts of coming out of a Christian background was finally admitting to myself that I was an atheist for all intents and purposes. All my life I had been taught that atheists were evil, selfish and lawless people and I didn't want to become one! It took time and the support of people (both online and in real life) to become comfortable with myself and lack of beliefs to the point of realizing that what I had been taught was false. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
noob Posted December 20, 2008 Share Posted December 20, 2008 Hello, Churee! I’m glad you are finding so much support at Ex-C. I’m fairly new and I am finding it extremely helpful. It can also be a lot fun! I frequently get an opportunity to read the board during the day, but I haven’t had a lot of time to post. However, I wanted to add my welcome and let you know that I’m hoping for many positive changes for you and Piracy in the future. Best wishes!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The-Captain Posted December 20, 2008 Share Posted December 20, 2008 Welcome to the site then Churee, I hope you find the discussions here of some efficacy. Whether it's support, counsel, debate, or idle chatter I think we have that covered. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Emme Posted December 20, 2008 Share Posted December 20, 2008 Hi Churee! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PiracyOfTheHead Posted December 20, 2008 Share Posted December 20, 2008 All the same, some of us are careful about posting photos or identifying details (real names, names of place where we live, etc.) on a public forum like this because anyone in the world can see it, including people who might like to get back at us. Some of us have no one like that in our lives and post anything we like, while others of us fear that former church members or family members will find our posts and make our lives even more miserable. Just thought I'd mention this, since you said you're totally new to talking on forums. The name I use looks like a real name but it's a pen name. She WANTS to have her little pic up there so she can get her compliments Ruby....gotta keep me on my toes and make life difficult PS...You NEVER wrote me back all that time ago...I went to your site, joined up, watched your Youtube VIDs...what happened???? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PIRACYs LADY Posted December 21, 2008 Author Share Posted December 21, 2008 As far as what crosses my mind at this particular moment. It's what exactly is the meaning for the season? I mean I use to think I knew. Use to be the lead singer and play the drums with the church band. But now as I am left with that no more I am feeling lost and unsure. Then there is the question of Santa clause. St. Nicholas, which I know was a true figure although not to the extent of what hw was portrayed. So my question to you would be as your thinking of christikas this year, what is your reason for celebrating the season. Hope to hear back from you soon. Churee I think there have been other postings about this, but basically I see this as a time to be with friends and family, and enjoy the pretty decorations. I still love the glow of a really well decorated tree, it almost seems magical. The only sour notes for me are when someone insists on making dogmatic religious statements intended to reaffirm their own beliefs rather than to bring joy and goodness to others. I don't at all mean the simple "Merry Christmas" that many give, but the more belabored "witnessing" that some try to force out. So I intend to focus on the things that I find magical and enjoyable. I think you are right about there hac=ving been other postings about the wuestion I had asked you but to be honest I have not figured out how to completley navigate the site yet to get to the certain areas, so I appricae you answering my question. I also see this time of year asa time to be with friends and exspecially family. And I also love the beautiful decorations. I love driving arounfd with the kids and going down all the streets that have the best lights. to se them smile like that, just brings me such joy and I guess could actually be the reason for my season.I would have to agree with you about the glow of a really well decorated Christmas tree as far as it being almost magical. We got a new one this year that was donated and it is so big. We have never had one so nice. I turn on all the lights the second it gets dark to be able to enjoy it. I hope that didnt sound to terribly dorky. I am in complete agreement with you on the sour notes and just plain bad feelings it brings when someone insists on making their dogmatic religious statements that are completley intended to reaffirm their own beliefs rather than bring any type og joy or happiness or even good cheer to any fellow human being. That saddens me. The "Merry Christmas" does not bother me either to be completly honest but its the wittnessing that seems to be being tried to be shoved down my throat in every mall or even in every parking lot. That I do not take well at all. I will try to niclely decline but if necesaary it has become not so nice. Those kind of people just really need to know when to quit with certain people. Im not shoving my belief system down their throats and I would hope for the same respect. I think I will for the most part focus in on what is still magical to me and the memories I have of the things that made me happy at xmas as a child. Like the silly, "you'll shoot your eye out movie", or the peanuts special, the beautifullights and trees and just my childrens smiles. Thier smiles are all the magic I need this year. (well lets hope so) I hope you aredoing well and I hope I can talk to you again soon. Have a great day. Churee Hi There Again Fuego, I was just looking over some of the first posts I had created and I wanted to say I was sorry for one in particular. I have to take alot of medication at present for cancer/broken bones in spine and my broken knee along with other illnessess. And I noticed that while I was in reply to you I had made several type O's and mispelled numerous things. Apparently my medication had all ready started to take effect before i even realized it. So I am sorry for that. While I am a college graduate, I really am not the best in spelling even in general and then when the medication kicks in,it takes it to a whole new bad spelling level. I hope at least you were able to get the just of what i meant though, and that I didn't completly embaress myself.I hope your having a good day. Churee Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
R. S. Martin Posted December 21, 2008 Share Posted December 21, 2008 She WANTS to have her little pic up there so she can get her compliments Ruby....gotta keep me on my toes and make life difficult PS...You NEVER wrote me back all that time ago...I went to your site, joined up, watched your Youtube VIDs...what happened???? Which site did you sign up on? What name did you use? Where did you post? I can't find any new posts on the Fighting Fundamentalist Religion site that I did not respond to. I checked my member list just now and there is nobody by the name Piracy (or similar) on it. I don't think I have videos on any other forums, so I am really puzzled what you are talking about. No pms, either, that I can find. Let me know and I'll check again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PIRACYs LADY Posted December 22, 2008 Author Share Posted December 22, 2008 Well, I can tell you right now that you dont sound dorky at all going on and on about the lights. I just wanted to assure you of that. LoL.I sound exactly the same as you do about the lights and decorations. I live out in Hemet,CA. , it's the senior citizen capitol of the world and our very very small news paper out here also publishes a map of all the best decorated houses for Christmas. Some of the older people even dress up like Santa for the kids and everthing is animated. We used to try and walk the whole way but now it has just gotten to far so we ride with my parents and go on the light tour with the kids. They get so so excited. I actually think I might go check out that book that you mentioned. It sounds like it would make me smile. I must agree with you, like about the movies we were talking about that bring us happiness during this season and honestly even not in this season. And National Lampoon's was a great choice along with my pick of A Christmas Story. My kids really liked the Grinch with Jim Carey.Do you have any others that you like? Yeah, I have to say that I really always have loved playing the drums, any kind. Yes... even the congas. You had mentioned that you hadnt had a chance to learn how to play them yet? If thats still the case I am sure i could somehow figure out a way to teach you how to play some simple songs over email or a website. Let me know if your interested, I would be glad to help you any way I can. They really are alot of fun and when you play them you can use them as a stess reducer. You mentioned that you liked tropical / Carabian music. Do you mind me asking if that is because of your ethnicity? My father loves that same kind of music too. He is half Spanish. And I'm in agreement with you to. The conga line can be fun. I remember when I used to listen to Miami Sound Machine and it was all about, " Come On Shake Your Body Baby Do That Conga." I guess thats probably giving away my age. Well I'm not embarrassed by it. I'm 32 years young. You said you choose buffet pan because you love Jimmy buffett music. I have to be honest, I dont think I have ever heard any of his stuff, but now that I have met you I will check some out for sure. Thanks for the encouragment on the writing my testimonial. I am going to hopefully finish it tomorow. I am alittle nervous as to what people might think of me but I do believe it might help me get some of this emotional pain gone. Thank you also for letting me know that you can tell through Nick's posts tht he loves me and is devoted to me.That is nice to hear from someone on the outside of our relationship. With so much going on , it is so hard to be able to see and feel that he still thinks about me like that. I love him to death. Oh also thank you for sending the link to that house with the xmas lights and the music. I got all the kids up here to watch it and they thought it was great. Well I guess thats it for now. I hope to hear from you soon. Yours and my personality seem to have alot in common.I look forward to becomming better friends. Churee Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PIRACYs LADY Posted December 22, 2008 Author Share Posted December 22, 2008 I was going over one of my posts to you from the other day and I just had to say I'm so sorry.I had taken my medication all ready that night for pain/cancer and apparantly it had all ready started to kick in because I noticed so many Type O's and such terrible spelling in the reply that I had to come on and say I was sorry. I hope you can forgive me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PIRACYs LADY Posted December 22, 2008 Author Share Posted December 22, 2008 Hey There Ruby, I'm sorry it has taken me so long to get back to you.I wanted to tell you that I appricate all of the good information/directions you gave me in reguards to the site.I am looking forward to typing you alittle longer reply but Nick and I are sharing the computer so it's hard for both of us to fit eveything in.But thanks again for the advice and I will write you again soon when I have at least an hour or so to reply to just you. You sem very intellegent and I had several questions that I would like to ask you. Anyway, have a great day. Churee Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PIRACYs LADY Posted December 22, 2008 Author Share Posted December 22, 2008 Hello There, And thank you so muchfor the reply. Also welcome to you also as it said you were also fairly new to this site too. I look forward to talking to you more and getting to know more about you and your views.If there is anything I can do to help in your deconversion process at all please dont hesitate to ask. Have a great day. Churee Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PIRACYs LADY Posted December 22, 2008 Author Share Posted December 22, 2008 Hello, Churee! I’m glad you are finding so much support at Ex-C. I’m fairly new and I am finding it extremely helpful. It can also be a lot fun! I frequently get an opportunity to read the board during the day, but I haven’t had a lot of time to post. However, I wanted to add my welcome and let you know that I’m hoping for many positive changes for you and Piracy in the future. Best wishes!!! Hi There, I wanted to thank you so much for your welcome. It made me feel very much as if in a strange way a coming home to a group of friends. I also thank you very much for your wish for Piracy and myself. That was kind of you. I hopeto get to talk to you more soon and get to know you as a person.Thanks again. Churee Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PIRACYs LADY Posted December 22, 2008 Author Share Posted December 22, 2008 Welcome to the site then Churee, I hope you find the discussions here of some efficacy. Whether it's support, counsel, debate, or idle chatter I think we have that covered. Hi There, I just wanted to take the time to thank you so much for your welcome to me. I appricate it very much. I also wanted to thank you for helping my husband with your advice and ideas on how to help us. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. Churee Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PIRACYs LADY Posted December 22, 2008 Author Share Posted December 22, 2008 She WANTS to have her little pic up there so she can get her compliments Ruby....gotta keep me on my toes and make life difficult PS...You NEVER wrote me back all that time ago...I went to your site, joined up, watched your Youtube VIDs...what happened???? Which site did you sign up on? What name did you use? Where did you post? I can't find any new posts on the Fighting Fundamentalist Religion site that I did not respond to. I checked my member list just now and there is nobody by the name Piracy (or similar) on it. I don't think I have videos on any other forums, so I am really puzzled what you are talking about. No pms, either, that I can find. Let me know and I'll check again. Hmmmmm, So my husband writes that I want to have my little pic up there so I can get my compliments and keep him on his toes and make his life difficult.... Well I will just go as far as to say I certainly do not put my pic up fpr the sole purpose of getting compliments from anyone. I hope that no one actually believes that I am that kind of a person. I just thought with this being kind of what semed like a clode knot community site and since my husband had been on here for awhile now that perhaps people might want to put a face with a name. That is all. Believe me, I do not believe i am anything special to look at, I mean I have had cancer 4 times now along with 2 broken bones in my back, a broken knee, epilepsy, brittle bone disease, heart problems and many more.I just pickd the most recent pic of myself I could find which was from about 9 months ago and put it on here so people would be able to put a face with aname.I am wanting to put up some pics of Nick and our kids as well. I really hope no one thought I put my pic up on here for cpmpliments. I am not that type of person. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
♦ Fuego ♦ Posted December 22, 2008 Share Posted December 22, 2008 No worries, Churee and Nick. Some of us post our pics, others don't. I might do a before and after pic later on in the summer once I lose my belly. But I seriously don't think anyone here is trying to hit on you or Nick, just being nice. After reading through the forums, I think most of the folks here tend to be a lot more relaxed with the male/female thing than we were as Christians, and sometimes we forget that those just coming out of faith will often still have strong wariness about such things. That is not a problem at all, so proceed as you best see fit. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
R. S. Martin Posted December 22, 2008 Share Posted December 22, 2008 She WANTS to have her little pic up there so she can get her compliments Ruby....gotta keep me on my toes and make life difficult PS...You NEVER wrote me back all that time ago...I went to your site, joined up, watched your Youtube VIDs...what happened???? Which site did you sign up on? What name did you use? Where did you post? I can't find any new posts on the Fighting Fundamentalist Religion site that I did not respond to. I checked my member list just now and there is nobody by the name Piracy (or similar) on it. I don't think I have videos on any other forums, so I am really puzzled what you are talking about. No pms, either, that I can find. Let me know and I'll check again. Hmmmmm, So my husband writes that I want to have my little pic up there so I can get my compliments and keep him on his toes and make his life difficult.... Well I will just go as far as to say I certainly do not put my pic up fpr the sole purpose of getting compliments from anyone. I hope that no one actually believes that I am that kind of a person. I just thought with this being kind of what semed like a clode knot community site and since my husband had been on here for awhile now that perhaps people might want to put a face with a name. That is all. Believe me, I do not believe i am anything special to look at, I mean I have had cancer 4 times now along with 2 broken bones in my back, a broken knee, epilepsy, brittle bone disease, heart problems and many more.I just pickd the most recent pic of myself I could find which was from about 9 months ago and put it on here so people would be able to put a face with aname.I am wanting to put up some pics of Nick and our kids as well. I really hope no one thought I put my pic up on here for cpmpliments. I am not that type of person. Not to worry, Churee. I figured he's just teasing. You seem like a really decent girl and I like you. Even if you do it for compliments, so what? Your pic looks nice and you have a right to know it. Religion likes to beat us down and into submission. There's two people it has failed to quite beat into submission--even with the help of cancer, mental illness, and other life hurdles--and that's Nick and Churee. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts